To The Girl With A Heavy Heart: Forgiveness Is Key

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and I feel the Lord has put it on my heart to share my story. I am one of many women who have experienced abuse. Abuse is a topic people often shy away from because it’s seen as embarrassing—but I’m here to tell you: speak up, because you’re not alone.

In 2023, I entered a relationship that I thought was the best thing to ever happen to me. At that time in my life, I didn’t have a relationship with Jesus, so my view of love was very wrong. Growing up, I was taught that validation from men was how you would feel most loved—which doesn’t help, considering how society has normalized that lie today.

I found myself putting my identity in that relationship and losing who I truly was. This led me to lower my self-worth and allow myself to be treated in ways that nobody deserves to be treated—ever.

Abuse isn’t just physical. There’s emotional, sexual, psychological, and more—none of which are okay. Toxic relationships have become so normalized that I began justifying abuse, believing it was normal. I chose not to tell anyone because I thought people would see me as crazy or dramatic.

If you’re unsure what real love looks like, please read 1 Corinthians 13:4–7. Nobody is perfect, but that does not give anyone the right to harm you.

When the relationship ended, I thought my life was over. I was broken from all the hurt I endured—physically, emotionally, and mentally. I wanted my life to be over. Feeling so worthless, I believed I had no purpose.

But that’s where the Lord met me—right where I was—and gave me the smallest glimpse of hope that things would get better. The Lord saved me and brought me out of a dark place I never thought would end. He began restoring my heart and healing me from unbearable pain.

Giving my life to the Lord has shown me peace within the storm. Sometimes we go through things we don’t understand, but the Lord always has a reason for the season (John 13:7).

Healing isn’t easy—there are hardships along the way. Forgiveness was something I struggled with for a long time. My mindset was, “How can I forgive someone who hurt me so badly when I loved them so much?” But the Lord calls us to forgive, just as He forgives us (Colossians 3:13).

Forgiveness doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a daily practice. That’s why we’re told to pick up our cross daily (Luke 9:23). Revenge is not the answer. That is not your portion-give it to the Lord and let him make it right!

You may lose people along the way. Some may even speak evil things over you or make you feel like your story isn’t true. Don’t let the devil win! Don’t let the lies of the enemy stop you from becoming the person the Lord has called you to be. Love them anyway.

So if you take anything away from this, please let it be forgiveness. It’s truly so important and powerful.

Over the past year, I’ve learned what real love is and found rest in Jesus. The Lord continues to move in my life, and He can move in yours too—if you let Him in.

If you or someone you know is struggling with abuse, please know you are not alone. You are so loved. Jesus is ready to restore, rebuild, and renew you.